I have been quiet for a while as I was going thru a battle getting my old scan images from Virginia Beach. Now they sent them 4 times, some how never getting to the right place. The 4th time I had them mailed directly to me. Like a dummy I handed the CD'S over to my doctors office with a promise they'd be mailed back to me. A month goes by and I wake up in the middle of the night thinking about those CD'S I never got back. Contacted my docs office and no one knows what happened to them and they were never down loaded or reviewed with the new scans. Needless to say I wasn't exactly thrilled at this. So with my tail between my legs I contacted Virginia Beach AGAIN.....this time I received my CD'S AND the print outs of the report's. Which all became a blessing as now we have measurements. Because my scans from 2005 & 2006 were not normal, as we were told back then. Who knows why! Thank God my cancer is super slow growing. It was interesting to say the least to read about the mass that almost caused me to lose my voice. Because in 2005 it was noticed. The spots in my lungs were also noticed, but were smaller. So with all this old but new information we are able to see that in 9 years my Lung masses have only grown 3 mm. What does this mean? It means I am living with cancer, and will for the rest of my life. The location's of my "poka dots" are smack in the middle of my lungs, which means no biopsy or surgery can be done. My radiation days are in my past, I can't have any more without giant risks. Just not worth it! My thyroid medication is double of what I used to take, and my body has accepted it without heart palpitations. Which is fantastic because the medication should keep the cancer from growing too much. 3 mm in 9 years isn't too bad. My doctor believes the poka dots in my lungs are the thyroid cancer, which we know by blood tests that it's still alive in me. It's taken me a bit of time to process and wrap my head around this information. I look at it as I have two choices: 1. I can be living, not stress over what I can't control. Or 2. I can be dying (which we all are, if you think about it). And get lost in a land of depression. We all have these 2 choices in life. I don't write this for pity or sympathy, but for those who want to know where this cancer road has taken me. My next blood work is December 2014 and another scan in July 2015. I just passed my 1st cancer birthday yesterday 19 years. Something to celebrate for sure!! My second cancer birthday is in 2 months.....something mighty special about that! Hugs and thankfulness for all the love and support you all have shown. ♡
